Garden of Innocence – Page 2 – The Turning Points of Life

On a Saturday morning prior to our Service for the Departed in 1982, Carol, Randy and I went to El Camino Memorial Park in San Diego. We went to visit the grave of one of our church members who had been laid to rest a few days before. We wanted to be sure that the fresh grave site was clean and dignified.

As we walked through the rows of grave sites in search of our church member’s grave, we glanced upon the many grave markers with names and dates. I was particularly taken and drawn to a grave stone of a young girl of seventeen. She had been murdered. I paused and prayed for her and her grieved parents. The deep hurt of her family leaped out of the inscription on the grave stone in the words “MURDERED” and “BARELY SEVENTEEN” and it gripped my soul.

We continued on until we found the grave of our friend. We found it was neatly groomed and still had some fresh flowers on it. After some moments of prayer and contemplation we left to return home.

As we drove through the park toward the exit, Randy saw a pond with ducks swimming around. He begged me to stop and allow him to go to see the ducks. I parked the car at the edge of the road and Randy and I got out.

We walked down the sloping grounds toward the pond. After a while observing the ducks swimming around the pond I told Randy it was time to leave and we began to trudge up the hill toward the car.

As we walked I looked down and noted that the grave stones had but one solitary date. I thought how unusual that was and realized that these were all very young children, infants most of them. I stopped in my tracks as the impact of this realization touched my soul. I stood transfixed as I took in the environment around me.

There in the midst of these graves were two pine trees with low hanging boughs. Dangling in the branches were toy cars and trucks, dolls and trinkets. I paused to consider this picture and realized that these toys were attempts of sorely grieving parents seeking to reach out to their child with a gift, a sign of their love for them not stilled by their death. I had this profound feeling in that instant; that what an amazing gift God gave us in prayer. We can pray for our departed loved ones, and thereby show our love for them in the spiritual and need not rely on the material.

Years later, I revisited this Garden of Innocents and found that the trees had been removed or trimmed and the toys and trinkets removed. Surveying the scene, now different from my first visit, in my heart I hoped that the parents of the babies memorialized there have since discovered that their prayers convey their undying love as no toy or trinket could ever do.

Turning Points

The first brief moment in the garden for innocent babies served to significantly deepen my appreciation for the awesome power of prayer. Faced with helpless and hopeless feelings that surface when we are unable to help someone, the power of prayer and the knowledge that prayer changes things, situations and me, becomes a turning point, revealing this God given resource known as prayer. It can be an inspiration to practice and master prayer, pouring out our deepest emotions to the One who hears and answers and changes things for our benefit.

I was a few weeks away from retiring from my evangelist ministry in the New Apostolic Church. In our faith, we have scheduled three special services each year that were dedicated to the departed. These services for the departed had very deep meaning for me and I made sincere deliberate preparations for them. My experience as a four year old boy had significant influence on my personal involvement in these services and this early turning point I documented in my story entitled “Aunt Frieda – My Grandma” (June 2015).

Divine services for the departed were scheduled each year for the first Sunday in March, July and November. It was the Saturday morning of March 1, 2008 that I woke up very early and in my morning prayer dedicated my day to preparation for this special divine service for the departed. Not only would the service be my last to officiate a departed service but it was also included the baptism of a very special baby girl named Samantha Angele. (See the story “Samantha Angele – Miracle Baby” to be published soon)

I began my morning by making a pot of coffee and a light breakfast. I retrieved the morning paper from our front porch and sat down at our kitchen counter. As I waited for the coffee to brew, I opened the paper and briefly scanned the front page of each section. Then my eyes fell upon the local Family Section that had emblazed on it a picture of a statue of a kneeling woman on a gravestone with children’s names engraved upon it. The article was entitled “A dignified farewell”.

I was immediately captivated by this article and read it completely from beginning to end. It told of this Garden of Innocence, a final resting place for abandoned children. I had never heard of it before. The article further stated that this Saturday they would be burying their 100th baby named Annemarie. Engulfed in the deep feelings the article evoked in me, I decided I had to attend this funeral service. I showed the article to my wife and we both agreed we had to make this funeral our priority for the day. We both felt it was a divine calling with feelings in both of us being so strong.

We dressed, prepared ourselves and drove the few miles to El Camino Memorial Park. When we arrived we were directed to a hilltop. W made our way through the cemetery’s green lawn strewn with gravestones leading to the hilltop. We reached the Garden and found over 100 visitors preparing for the 10 am service. We of course had no idea what to expect. The guests sat on white folding chairs under a large green temporary canopy next to a circular sidewalk. The statue of the kneeling woman whose image was in the newspaper was off to one side of the sidewalk. Seeing it in person was very touching, as her face depicted a mother’s heartache at the loss of her child. The names on the stone and the dates, we later learned, memorialized babies whose remains had been cremated prior to entry into the Garden.

In the middle of the circular sidewalk were grave stones with the unique Garden of Innocence angel and heart logo and the names of babies interned previously. At the head was Adam’s headstone, the first baby to enter the Garden on June 19, 1999.

As the service began, a contingent of forty or more Knights of Columbus, dressed in their full regalia, marched up the hill toward the Garden escorting Annemarie in her little hand made wooden casket. The elegance of the Knights with their colorful formal dress replete with capes, swords and plumed hats added to the heart touching atmosphere. Elissa Davey the founder of the Garden sang a moving song “In this Special Place”. This song created a wonderful spirit of peace that came over the whole garden. As the Knights approached the Garden entrance, all in attendance were invited to form a circle of love on the circular sidewalk to welcome baby Annemarie into the Garden.

What happened next was quite unexpected but very moving. After we silently and reverently formed our circle on the sidewalk; the casket was passed from one to another. As I held the casket in my arms, deep feelings stirred in my soul. I quietly expressed my love to baby Annemarie and invited her to be my special guest at the service for the departed the next day. As I did this the song “O Come with Me” filled my thoughts. The first words of the song “O Come with me and I will lead you gently into a garden of enchanting charm” seemed so perfect. It depicted the special feelings that consumed me in that moment. Immediately I decided that this song would serve as the opening hymn for Sunday’s service. I passed the casket into the arms of my wife Carol. She also invited Annemarie to our service and passed her on to the next guest beside her in the circle. When the casket reached the end, the last person placed that casket on a table draped in a white tablecloth. Flowers and a small stuffed animal were placed to adorn the casket.

Next was a reading of a poem for Baby Annemarie and then the visiting minister offered up a prayer and sermon. Each was very touching and caused movement in our hearts and souls. People were invited to share what the Garden meant to them and then came the very impressive dove ceremony.

A white dove was given to a volunteer and the dove was released to represent the spirit of Annemarie being set free. The dove flew around a few times but instead of leaving to fly home as it normally would, it landed on the overhead canopy.

Carol and I were standing next to the canopy and Joe, the owner of the doves, was also standing there next to us. He remarked that this was strange in that it had never happened at the Garden before. Carol asked me if I thought there was some significance to this bird landing and staying on the canopy.

I said, “I think it is Annemarie telling us she accepts our invitation for service tomorrow.”

Then three more doves released were for the Trinity followed by a group of volunteers who read off one by one the 99 names of the other babies in the Garden. When the last name was read, two large white wicker baskets that were placed in the center of the circle were opened. There must have been 100 beautiful white doves that flew up in a din of fluttering wings, up through the trees circling the Garden in the sky above until they turned and left for their home. It was simply breathtaking.

Carol and I left the Garden that day with emotions and feelings that were overwhelming. But the story didn’t end there. We made our way home and had lunch. We took a break to relax a bit in our back yard recounting our experience in the Garden when the telephone rang.

It was a member from our church who had volunteered to provide the flowers for the special Sunday morning service. She asked if she could stop by to share a special experience she had that morning. I encouraged her to stop by on her way home from church.

Birgit and her family were from Germany and living in San Diego. Her husband was stationed with the military in San Diego for three years. She was very talented with flowers as well as with music. When she arrived she asked how our visit to the funeral service had gone. I briefly shared our experience but for some reason did not mention the song that had captured my soul as I held Annemarie in my arms.

Then Birgit told us what she had experienced that morning. When she finished preparation of the flowers for the service, she began to leave to bring them to church. But as she walked past the organ in her living room, she felt a strong impulse to go to it and play. She sat down at the organ and noted that her hymnal was already open to No. 296 “O Come with Me” and she began to play it.

I asked Birgit at what time it was when this happened. She said it was shortly after 10 am and asked me why. I told her that at about that very time, I held the baby Annemarie in her casket in my arms, and that song entered my heart. That’s when I decided it would be the opening hymn on Sunday.

We were all profoundly moved and attributed the whole series of events to the wonderful hand of our faithful loving God and Father. We marveled at the many fine details that comprised the events of the day.

The next morning was one of the most moving experiences in the sanctuary of God that I ever lived. A detailed pronouncement of that day will be forthcoming.

Turning Points

This experience was a major turning point for me. I was wondering as I approached my retirement; what does God have for me as a new ministry? Well this was an answer I could not ignore; rather it was one that I heartily embrace to this day. It is not possible for me to put into words that are worthy of the feeling and experiences I have been blessed with as I actively participate in this precious ministry. Every volunteer, every participant is masters at blessing each other by their joyfully generous contributions to our Garden Babies and the family the Garden has become. I am so blessed to be a part of it.

Each visit to the Garden brings new connections, new friends and new turning points that create the greatest joy and grateful expressions to our God for all He has made possible through this ministry. Watch for the chronicles to follow to describe these precious moments.
[The song “O Come with Me” Lyrics by

[ To learn more about the Garden of Innocence and how to donate to its cause, please visit them at www.gardenofinnocence.org ]

Category: Garden of Innocence

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